flightforfreedom | MoM IC Inbox

Hey, you big nerd! I'm back from being ported out. Thanks for noticing I was gone, but from the ashes, I rise! I've got some answers for you re: the texts you sent me. A: You're still cleaning the droid because it's dirrrrrrrty. Teeheehee. B: Something funny to tell you before you die - my friend has a talking sword and I have a rainbow sword and the talking sword is in love with the rainbow one? That's not funny so much as it is cool. C: WAY TO WORRY ABOUT ME WAY TO BE IN LOVE WITH ME WAY TO LIKE ME WAY TO THINK I'M YOUR FRIEND WAY TO BE INTO ME WAY TO WANT ME AS A BUDDY WAY TO THINK I'M COOL AHAHAHAHAHAHA

Glad you're back safe and sound, bud, had me worried for a minute there. A: It's not HIM it's his ROOM because FORCE apparently droids collect a lot of really random shit. [Definitely not telling Odin about the porn mags.]

B: That - is insane, what really? Do they talk? Like not how my power makes everything talk but on their own, normally, to everyone. C: :P glad to have you back buddy

Sorry for worrying you. I can do sweet flips now, though? So. Worth it. What kinda stuff does he collect? [ TELL HIM ABOUT THE PORN MAGS POE ]

Also Jack, my friend's sword? He talks to everyone. Mine can't, but I was pretending that she could. I put on a french accent and moved her around and tried to sound like a hot girl. I don't think he noticed? Maybe he noticed. Ugh, love is complicated and confusing.

Not your fault. You're not the first one - a couple of my friends have disappeared only to come back a couple days later. Just keep expecting it to be permanent. Uh - weird things. Clothes, toys, literal garbage, magazines, advertisements - I have no idea why most of this stuff is here, and of course, he can't tell me. [HE WILL TAKE KAY'S SECRET TO THE GRAVE] Well that - certainly sounds complicated, hahaha, but I think it's not that complicated most of the time. Unless you're actually talking about something else.

Ah - one of my friends went home the same day I did. I would have been terrified if I were here when it happened, I think. I don't want to lose anyone, which is selfish, because I know a lot of people have homes they want to go back to, but. Mehh. Are... are those things weird? I have so many toys and clothes and garbage in my room. Maybe you're weird for not-- POE WE SHOULD GO TOY SHOPPING!!!!!!!!!! I'm gonna buy you a toy. What kinda stuff do you like? No, you're totally wrong. Love is weird and relationships are stupid. That's why I just write friendfiction and get crushes on everyone and try to make a sentient sword fuck a normal sword. Life is hard enough without swords fucking each other, I think.

It's not selfish to care about your friends and to want to be with them, Odin. Mine - some of mine would go back to the moments of their deaths. So yeah. I'd prefer to have them stay here and never leave.

Weird things for a droid who doesn't wear clothes, is what I mean. I actually do have a few models - I'd be up for shopping. I could show you my collection.

Okay admittedly that does sound incredibly complicated, but usually when someone starts telling me that love sucks it's because they're in it. So come on, spill, what's up?

Oh... I'm sorry. That must be a heavy weight to carry. I have to go home to a war... but that's a lot better than some of the other people around here. I know people who have already died... it scares me to think about what might happen to them if they leave. But - let's talk about something else. This is too sad. I was thinking, like, a super-soaker or a video game or something, but sure! Show me your models. Are they, like, moving? Can you make them move? WHAT IF I USED MAGIC ON THEM TO MAKE THEM MOVE* *this might break them very hard No, no, nothing like that. Just-- Okay. My friend's talking sword! I wanted him to fall in love with my sword so bad. I learned how to say hot words in french and I moved her around in the air all sexy and pretty and nice. And Magnus, my friend who owns the sword? He was just like "I'm gonna make Jack cut her in half because you ruined my tent!" And Jack said bye to her and went back to Magnus and I think he would have cut her in half for real if I hadn't backed off. I just don't know why they didn't fall in love like I wanted them to. I don't know. What am I going to do with all these hot words in french I know? We don't even have french in my homeland. Jack's the talking sword, by the way.

What's a super soaker?

They don't move but it would be pretty kriffing awesome if you could make them fly so yes, let's do that. I'm not at home right now, though, so I'll let you know.

Out of curiosity, when waving it around, did you also happen to destroy his tent

I'm sure any sexy language can later be useful. What does French sound like?

It's like, this cool big gun that shoots water? I only learned about it since coming here. I enchanted one to shoot rainbows and glitter. It was a lot of fun. And also kind of pointless? But a lot of fun. Let me know!!! I'LL BE WAITING. I don't want to answer the tent question. It's like, um--

[ he sends an audio clip, then, of himself speaking french into the mic. voulez-vous coucher avec moi, at first, followed by something deep and growly that sounds pretty hot until he absolutely uses the words "JERKIN' IT" in english because he couldn't find a good translation. then something that he translates as he goes along, which is the story about a fox stealing an apple from a turtle? it's not sexy, just kinda weird. ]

There? There.

That sounds amazing, I want to see it.

Also, the last part didn't make a lot of sense but yeah I can see the appeal of French. Maybe I should try to learn some...

I'll bring it by some time! It'll be fun. We can graffiti someone's house with rainbows or something. I don't think you need it? You're pretty hot without enhancements. Enhancements are kinda what I rely on. The mesh, etcetera.

Sometimes I don't think you appreciate the fact that you have the body of - how do they put it here - a "Greek god".

Hm. Say more nice things about my body, please.

Alright. You look like someone carved every one of your muscles out of stone and took 300 years to polish them.

You could probably run an entire anatomy class on your abs alone but no one would remember anything because they'd be too distracted.

Edited 2017-11-12 20:41 (UTC)

That mesh of yours wears like a second skin but I'm pretty sure the first skin would look even better by itself, and I think we might need to test that assumption.

Also I've seen that monster you don't exactly hide in that suit.

Poe!!!!!!!!!!! I'M SO ENTHUSIASTIC AND HAPPY ABOUT YOU LIKING MY BODY. RAUGH... THIS ERECTION YOU'VE GIVEN ME! IT'S... TEARING AT MY CLOTHES!!!!! WITH THE STRENGTH OF A RAGING DRAGON! YOU'VE AWOKEN THE BEAST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But also thank you for indulging me. Ugh, Poe. I don't know what I would have done if I were ported home for real and I didn't have you around to compliment me on my dick size anymore. I'd be so sad and alone.

Well, then you better let it out before it destroys something. Well - you wouldn't remember me anyway, so at least you wouldn't feel too bad about it. I'm sure you'd find someone else to compliment it. But let's just hope everyone stays here instead.

Okay but we gotta do the cool hot jerk off over text thing one day!! Not now because I wanna talk about my feelings. But next time!!! REMEMBER!!! PHONE SEX!!!!! POE DAMERON!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyway, no, fuck that. I don't want to not remember you. I love you. You're like, my sixth best friend. Not as in, like, ranking. As in Number 6, Of Equal Value To The Other 5, Sorted In Chronological Order Re: When I First Met Them. You've always been kind and fun to be around and I don't want to ever forget that, or the nice dong-touches you've provided.

I'll remember. Don't you worry about that. ;)

It's not exactly something I'm looking forward to either, you know. I was blissfully unaware of it for a while. But it does kind of - I don't know. Take some of the pressure off, about going home. Knowing that I'll show up the exact moment I left, like nothing happened. So this place - it's just like a completely different life. And you're probably my best friend number 6 too, bud.

What are you going back to, exactly? Do you remember the moment you were taken from?

War.

Yeah. I do. Two days after the Starkiller was destroyed. After the Starkiller destroyed five planets and the entire Republic fleet. The war is only started.

Pilots don't have a particularly long life expectancy anyway, but - with the state of things - I'm going to be lucky if I last another year. If it means taking the First Order down - I'm happy to go down too.

That's... fuck. I know this is hypocritical, because I'm a soldier, I get it. When I go home - I mean, I should have died a long, long time ago. I'm way past my expectancy date. But - I don't want that for you. It sounds like you're dedicated, and that's great, but I don't want that for you. I wish I could save you.

[He switches to video, mostly so that he can smile and reassure Odin that he's not that worried about it. Because he genuinely isn't.]

Hey. Look, if everything goes according to plan, I survive, save everyone, and the First Order goes down in flames. So don't worry too much about it. It doesn't make any difference here, right?

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1/? Challenge accepted.

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We can probably leave this here???